Steve Bussey's Blog: Generation Me

Jean Twenge has written a very interesting book studying today's youngest generation to have come of age. In these postings, I will begin to provide key quotes and references that have stood out to me. From that, I have posted a few questions for reflection. For more information on this book, I encourage you to explore her website: generationme.org

Also see my article: Me, MySpace and iPod: Tales of a Culture Stuck in the Mirror Phase of Development and Its Moral Implications

INTRODUCTION
CHAPTER 1:
YOU DON'T NEED THEIR APPROVAL: The Decline of Social Rules

CHAPTER 2:
AN ARMY OF ONE: Me

NOTABLE QUOTES

"["Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all" - Whitney Houston] ...is a stunning reversal in attitude from previous generations. Back then, respect for others was more important than respect for yourself. The term "self-esteem" wasn't widely used until the late 1960s, and didn't become talk-show and dinner-table conversation until the 1980s. By the 1990s, it was everywhere" (p.44).

"How did self-esteem transform from an obscure academic term to a familiar phrase that pops up in everything from women's magazines to song lyrics to celebrity interviews? ...[in th 1970s], the ascendance of the self truly exploded into the American consciousness. In contrast to previous ethics of honor and duty, Baby Boomer ideals focused instead on meaning and self fulfillment" (p.45)

"Generation Me had no need to reincarnate ourselves; we were born into a world that already celebrated the individual. The self-focus that blossomed in the 1970s became mundane and commonplace over the next two decades, and GenMe accepts it like a fish accepts water" (p.49).

"Psychologist Martin Seligman says that the traditional self - responsible, hardworking, stern - has been replaced with the "California self," a self that chooses, feels pleasure and pain, dictates action and even has things like esteem, efficacy, and confidence" (p.50f.).

THE SELF ACROSS THE GENERATIONS (p.50)

BABY BOOMERS
> Self-fulfillment
> Journey, potentials, searching
> Change the world
> Protests and group sessions
> Abstraction
> Spirituality
> Philosophy of Life

GENERATION ME
> Fun
> Already there
> Follow your dreams
> Watching TV and surfing the web
> Practicality
> Things
> Feeling good about yourself

"In the years after 1980, there was a pervasive, society-wide effort to increase children's self-esteem. The Boomers who now filled the ranks of parents apparently decided that children should always feel good about themselves" (p.53).

"...the implicit message is that self-esteem can be taught and should be taught... children are encouraged to believe that it is acceptable and desirable to be preoccupied with oneself [and] praise oneself. In many cases... it's not kust encouraged, but required. These exercises make self-importance mandatory, demanding of children that they love themselves..." (p.56, quoting John Hewitt).

"Maureen Stout notes, many educational psychologists believe that schools should be 'places in which children are insulated from the outside world and emotionally - not intellectually - nourished... My colleagues always referred to the importance of making kids feel good about themselves but rarely, if ever, spoke of achievement, ideals, goals, character, or decency.' The future teachers whom Sourt was educating believed that 'children shouldn't be challenged to try things that others in the class are not ready for, since that would promote competition, and competition is bad for self-esteem" (p.64).

"...research shows that when people with high self-esteem are criticized, they became unfriendly, rude, and uncooperative, even toward people who had nothing to do with the criticism" (p.65)

"Martin Seligman has criticized self-esteem programs as empty and shortsighted. He argues that self-esteem based on nothing does not serve children well in the long run; it's better, he says, for children to develop real skills and feel good about accomplishing something... Self-esteem is an outcome, not a cause. In other words, it doesn't do much good to encourage a child to feel good about himself just to feel good; this doesn't mean anything. Children develop true self-esteem from behaving well and accomplishing things" (p.66).

"Kids who are given meaningless A's and promoted when they haven't learned the material will later find out in college or the working world that they don't know much at all. And what will that do to their self-esteem, or, more important, their careers?" (p.68)

"Narcissists are overly focused on themselves and lack empathy for others, which means they cannot see another person's perspective... They also feel entitled to special privileges and believe that they are superior to other people. As a result, narcissists are bad relationship partners and can be difficult to work with. Narcissists are also more likely to be hostile, feel anxious, compromise their health, and fight with friends and family. Unlike those merely high in self-esteem, narcissists admit that they don't feel close to other people... Narcissism is the darker side of the focus on the self, and is often confused with self-esteem. Self-esteem is often based on solid relationships with others, whereas narcissism comes from believing that you are special and more important than other people" (p.68-70).

"Many young people alse display entitlement, a facet of narcissism that involves believing that you deserve and are entitled to more than others... The rise in narcissism has very deep roots. It's not just that we feel better about ourselves, but that we even think to ask the question. We fixate on self-esteem, and unthinkingly build narcissism, because we believe that the needs of the individual are paramount. This will stay with us even if the self-esteem programs end up in the dustbin of history..." (p.70f.)

QUESTIONS TO PONDER

1. How does the version of self-esteem that Twenge discusses in this chapter differ from a strong sense of self? (see Martin Seligman's contrast of 'traditional- and California-self, p.50f.)

2. In the 1960s, Boomers were referred to as "the 'Me' Generation," but Twenge suggests that this was more temporary fad during the adolescence period. It isn't until the 1990s that the true Generation Me emerges (p.50). In what ways do these two generations differ? Is it possible that one generation are immigrants while the other are natives to these narcissistic tendencies?

3. One of the philosophical implications of the self-esteem movement was to "make kids feel good about themselves' rather than speaking of achievement, ideals, goals, character, or decency" (p.64). At what point does the need to make a student 'feel good' get in the way of truly preparing people for the future? (see on p.64 the "Kids who are given meaningless As..." quote)

4. What are the consequences of leaving a 'mindset of entitlement' (p.70) unchallenged?

SUPPLEMENTAL AIDS FOR THIS CHAPTER